Friday, 19 August 2016

Feeling Overwhelmed Again

From my last post, you might have guessed that I'm feeling a little overwhelmed, de-motivated and out of sorts, if I'm honest. I don't know if it's a summer holidays thing.

The house feels a mess, I'm behind on my laundry and chores, there's piles of donations to take to the next Give or Take day and I've not really done anything with LB of any merit this summer. I'm on a bit of a self-inflicted guilt trip I think.

Yesterday, she was relieved of coming to the blood donation session with me, as a friend contacted her and she spent the day with her.  I was pleased for her, as all her friends seem to be away for the entire summer this year, so there's no one to hang out with.  As well as being pleased for her, I felt a little pressure taken off and headed off to the Blood session alone.

Unfortunately, I got snarled up in traffic on the way and was 20 minutes late. The donation system, however, had no slack in it to allow me to still donate, so I was pretty unimpressed to be honest and I've decided to stop donating for a while.

Not just for this reason, but also because I've been wanting to take some supplements of late and haven't done so because I feel they might not be compatible with blood donation.  I really want to give them a try and as I've now got this whole cholesterol thing going on, I need to focus on myself a little and concentrate on getting my own health under control for a few months.  I still want to donate and feel it is a very valuable thing to do, but I need a break.

I think that my minor health issues are a lot to do with how I'm feeling at the moment, so I need to take charge of it. I feel I'm pretty health conscious and healthy, but then you receive a blow like the raised cholesterol and you feel that all the good you are doing with exercise and reasonably healthy eating is just negated.  I'm floundering at the moment, not knowing what I can do to improve things. I've started with all the cholesterol lowering products, which I must say, don't inspire me that much and are also very expensive, but as I have no choice, I just need to persevere and hope they get results.

The next thing on the list is to possibly lose some weight, but I have no intention of dieting.  I'm going to focus on improving my digestion and boosting my metabolism and see how it goes, hence where the supplements come in.

Today, thanks to the weather and LB having been out all day yesterday, she's happy to stay home and chill, so I get to do the same and tackle the ironing mountain.  Once it is done, I'm at least up to date on laundry, which I haven't been since before our holiday.

I got to the allotment yesterday afternoon too and made big inroads into clearing the plot.  The fact that LB was otherwise occupied and the email encouragement I'd received from the Committee Secretary probably helped a lot in motivating me.  There's only a small area left to clear by the end of the month.  I also managed to transplant some kale plants, to fill one of the beds.

It's looking better than it has in a couple of seasons, which makes me feel like I want to continue with it, but I know that downsizing to a small plot, if I can, is the right thing to do, as the pressure to maintain it always casts a shadow over the summer months.  If I get offered a smaller plot I will take it, but if not, I'm not sure what I'll do now and might try to hang on until one becomes available.

In the meantime, and on a more positive note, the garden is benefiting from some rain today. Frankly, it needed it, as did the allotment and the water butt which was virtually empty.  I've got a week's worth of salad leaves left in one raised bed, so it should see me through to September, meaning I've had three months worth of salad leaves from it, which is good for me, especially as I eat it most days.

The rain has also been good for me mentally, as it has made me look towards the autumn, which I find more enjoyable and comfortable weatherwise.  I always prefer to be wrapped up a little rather than overheated. Having said this, it has been a nice summer, for the most part.

We had good news this week with regard to OH's parents' camper van, in that the damage we caused to it only cost £100 or so pounds to repair, which was a major relief.  It doesn't excuse our carelessness, but at least it was affordable and the work has now been done, so that they can use it to get away this week. We will, of course, be reimbursing them the whole amount.

Another positive is that I just checked out the next date of the Give or Take and there's one advertised for mid September, so an end to the rising donation pile is in sight. I might have to do another round of decluttering in time for it, as this is something else that has been put on the back burner lately.

I'm getting there, but it just feels like wading through treacle at the moment.  I guess we all have times like this every now and then, so I'm trying not to let it get me down too much and appreciate the relative peace and quiet before time starts hurtling towards the big C.

Apologies for having a moan on here, I don't like to do it, but sometimes it can be quite cathartic and helps me to get focused on pulling myself out of it. Life isn't all roses round the cottage door, it has it's difficulties too and I generally prefer to hear about peoples' lives warts and all. It's in the struggles that we find fellowship.


  1. With regards to your raised cholesterol, I have suffered since my teens, I now have to take statins. For years I keeps my levels lower by keeping check on my foods, and this was before you could purchase all the specialist products. One good tip was not to eat process foods with loads of hidden extras in them. I still eat dairy but I do limit the amounts, them being a treat rather than the norm, plus we do meat and fish free twice a week, plus eating fish once a week, it all works for me. These days I still do not buy the specialist products, if you shop careful you can still get great things to eat. I hope you are feeling better soon.

    1. Thank you for your tips. They are very helpful. Do you find you have any side effects on the statins, as the doctor mentioned that they can cause muscle wastage. It is a possiblity that I may have to take them at some point in the future.

    2. I have not had side effects, but in truth with a cancer scare in 2010, some could have sneezed in, but I'm feeling good on them, plus it's one less worry for me.

    3. I think the worry thing is important as that in itself can cause a whole raft of other problems. I'm glad to hear that you are feeling good on them.

  2. Sometimes it's beneficial to slow down and take stock. Baby steps will still get you to the same destination - there's no rush - take your time and I hope you get back on track with renewed vigour.

    1. Thanks for your kind comment, Mum. You are right when you say there is no rush. I am probably putting unnecessary pressure on myself.

  3. A friend once said "How do you eat an elephant?" She then answered herself by saying "One small bite at a time."

    Keep taking those small bites and you will be back on track in no time at all.

    God bless.

    1. Thanks for your support Jackie. I will try to take your advice.